Happily Ever After

This is a video that Jenny Phillips made to go along with her CD for the 2011 youth theme. It's amazing. And my son is in it! He's the curly haired boy that says that princesses like to sit and watch TV. He also is in it later in the video. It has such a great message.

Teaching Kids the Traffic Light System

Our whole family needs to be healthier.  I took our oldest to a doctor's appointment this week and our doctor gave us an amazing handout about food.  It's so fun for kids.  It's called traffic light style eating and here's how it works.  The traffic light system encourages healthy eating by guiding you to choose foods that are high in fiber, high in nutrients, low in sugar, good sources of healthy oils and foods that are low in saturated fats.  

GREEN LIGHT FOODS can be eaten daily or often.  They are high in fiber and low in sugar and saturated fats.  Some examples are: whole grain bread, brown rice, oatmeal, corn tortillas, Cheerios, Wheat Chex, Shredded Wheat, Raisin Bran, Fresh Fruits and veggies, fat free milk, low fat string cheese, beans, tofu, tuna canned in water, water, etc.  

YELLOW LIGHT FOODS can be eaten weekly or sometimes.  They are often made with refined grains, have a small amount of added sugar, and contain moderate amounts of fat.  Some examples are:  white bread, white rice, pancakes, animal crackers, muffins, graham crackers, dried fruit, olives, avocado, mashed potatoes, 2% milk, low fat ice cream, light cream cheese, hamburger, peanut butter, sports bars, jam, popsicles, granola bars, 100% juice, etc.

RED LIGHT FOODS  can be eaten monthly or rarely.  They are generally processed, contain high amounts of sugar and fat, and have very little if any fiber.  Some examples are:  donuts, croissants, cheese crackers, corn chips, top ramen, macaroni and cheese, fettuccini alfredo, sugar cereals, creamed soups, french fries, tator tots, potato chips, whole milk, chocolate milk, whipped cream, bacon, sausage, pepperoni, chicken nuggets, hot dogs, mayonaise, butter, salad dressing, candy, soda, lemonade, punch, etc.

Our family was eating so many red light foods it was disgusting.  I had my kids look over the lists and then we went grocery shopping.  It was really fun.  We have a long way to go to get FULLY healthy but by choosing more green light foods we will be on the right track!  Stay tuned to see how our entire family is doing!

There are no "Soul Mates"

I have to make this quick...I'm off to girls night out.  I've been thinking about all the weight loss programs out there lately.  I don't believe in soul mates.  I don't believe there is JUST one person out there for you.  And I don't believe that there is JUST one weight loss program out there that works.  I am reading "Intuitive Eating."  I just finished chapter 1 and I have to admit that I'm pretty excited about it.  I've tried other weight loss programs and I just didn't feel like it was a fit for me personally...AND THAT'S OK.  So if you are feeling stuck in a rut, shake things up a little.  Research other methods.  You might just like it.

 I am excited to read this book because I am an emotional eater.  I each because I'm happy, sad, depressed, anxious, bored...you name it I eat because of it.  My whole life revolves around food.  I even woke up last night day dreaming (or night dreaming?) of the soup that my friend, Sam, sent home with me.  It was so yummy!  Anyways, I need to get a grip on my eating.  But more importantly I need to get a grip on why I eat. 

I went to a meditation class last night and it was amazing.  It was so eye opening.  I have so many fears that really do hold me back.  I'm ready and willing to let go and let God take them from me.  I'm ready to heal.  I'm ready to listen to my body.  I'm ready for a change. 

Just Kidding...

I know I said that I was going to combine blogs but I changed my mind after attending an amazing conference today.  I have so much to share and to learn from.  I can't wait to blog about it.  I've also decided to keep blogging here because I love what this blog is all about.  It's a battle worth winning.  Depression is a battle worth winning and so is the battle with weight.  And I want to share my journey with the blogging world.  I'm taking my mess and making it my MESSage! 

Blog is moving...

In an effort to simplify my life I'm combining my blogs. So come check me out at www.stwarnercorner.blogspot.com

Trust me...you won't be disappointed!  Make sure you follow me on that blog!

Overnight Oatmeal

My husband and I went on a cruise last January. Every morning for breakfast I ate this oatmeal concoction that was to die for. It seemed that the oatmeal had been soaked in milk and then they added bananas, dried fruits and nuts. Oh my gosh...it was soooo good. So I have searching for a recipe similar to it and couldn't find one like that. I'm not sure why I just didn't create my own recipe! I found a recipe last night for Overnight Oatmeal. She took 1/2 C oatmeal and soaked it overnight in 1/2 C skim milk (I'm sure the stuff on the cruise was whole milk). She added cinnamon, nutmeg and walnuts.

Here's my "cruise" version:
1/2 C oatmeal
1/2 C skim milk
cinnamon
nutmeg
Cover and let it soak overnight.

This morning I added 1/2 frozen blueberries, thawed out and 2 T chopped pecans.
I made too much last night so I had the rest for lunch this afternoon. I added 1 sliced banana and 2 T pecans. Then I sprinkled it with a packet of Splenda.

I realized that I like it sweet and it wasn't very sweet this morning. But it was perfect for lunch. Not quite the way I remember it on the cruise (creamy, whole milk goodness). But it was VERY close. I swear I could eat this for every meal and not get tired of it.

8.2 Pounds!

Yea baby! I've lost 8.2 pounds. What's the "secret?" Eating the right foods, in the right amount, getting sleep and exercising. Oh wait...I haven't been good about that one...YET. I'm parking futher away, walking to places when I can, etc. So I'm making small little changes. It's going to be so much easier to get a session at the gym in when the kids are back in school. I can drop them off and go! I know...excuses, excuses. I've also added in something else to my weight loss journey. More to come on that later. Some might get it and other will think I'm a freak...I don't care though. I "heart" it.

Greek Yogurt...Get Your YUM On!

Did you see how much protein this yogurt has in it? I had never tried Greek yogurt before. I found the little cups at Walmart for only $1.00 each. That's a great price for this stuff. I bought the plain variety and added frozen blueberries and then sprinkled some Splenda on top. It was really, really good and really, really healthy.
I've been able to stay withing my calorie limits and not feel very hungry at all. I'm still having trouble getting all my water in for the day. Any suggestions on how I can get it all in? I need some creative ways...water is not my favorite thing.

Diamond Star For ME and YOU!

I hit my first 5 pound mark today! I'm giving myself a silver, diamond star. Why silver and diamonds you ask? In Boy Scouts silver is actually higher than gold. And I'm more of a silver kind of gal. And diamonds? Well they ARE a girls best friend and it's my birthstone. So there you have it. I'll award it to you too! Just share your progress with us and it will be my award to my fellow bloggers. Who wouldn't want a silver diamond star for doing something excellent? So share with me your successes and I'll award you with a star!

PB Banana Split

This picture is from trainermomma.com. I tried this recipe today. I cut a medium size banana in half, spread 1 T peanut butter on it, added 1/2 C vanilla yogurt and then topped it off with 1/4 C Fiber One cereal. It was delicious. And it's only 290 calories. It's one healthy breakfast! Thanks trainermomma!
I've lost 3.8 pounds so far. That's 3.8 closer to my goal. It's 3.8 pounds that I'll never have to carry around with me ever again. It's 3.8 pounds closer to shopping at THE GAP again! It's 3.8 pounds closer to having new family pictures taken. It's 3.8 pounds closer to being comfortable.
What are your favorite healthy foods?

Changes are a coming...

I've been wasting money each month on my WW pass. It just wasn't working for me. I had NO motivation to follow their program. I'd leave my weekly meetings frustrated and feeling worse about myself. I'm not sure why I felt that way. I didn't want to count points. I didn't want to journal. It just wasn't working for me and that's ok.
My sister sent me a link the the MOST amazing blog EVER. She talks about an iPhone app called "Lose It." This FREE app is exactly what I was looking for. It was able to calculate my daily calories needed in order to lose weight. You have the option of having it calculate the calories needed in order to lose 1/2, 1, 1 1/2 and 2 pounds a week. It will also give you an approximate date that you will acheive your weight loss goal. Trainer Momma has recipes and workouts listed on her blog. She's a personal trainer and I know that she's an answer to prayers!
For the first time in years I woke up today excited and ready to start. I even want to exercise. I read a woman's story about how a year ago she could barely walk up her driveway and now she can run 13 miles. I want that to be me. I'm ready to lose the weight once and for all.
I'm tired of carrying around with my my badge of depression, stress, and even happiness. I ate all the time for all the wrong reasons. I hate horrible food. I'm ready to change.
Last night I cut everything in half before I put it on my plate. I had 1/2 of a chicken breast, 1/2 corn on the cob, fruit and cucumbers and tomatoes. I was totally satisfied and happy that I had been able to actually face the fear of being hungry and just do it.
I am doing well with my goals. I'm not working on all of them at once of course but I am working on some. I know it will be so much easier when the kids are back in school. And I have more time to work on them.
Thanks for the support.

Goal Setting

I have NEVER been good at setting goals. Wait, scratch that. I'm good at setting them. I'm just not good at following through with them. Maybe if I post them on here for all the world to see I'll be held a little more accountable.

I've been really thinking today about my priorities in my life and what goals I'd like to set. I was researching on the internet and came across Celestial University. It was just what I was looking for. I am going to earn my Bachelor degree. Here's what I had to do. I had to pick a major. Then I had to choose 8 goals for that major and 5 goals in the College of Theology. Then I had to pick 3 goals in each other college. This is probably not making any sense if you haven't cliked the link. So go click it.

Here's what I'm working on. I've chosen Physical Education as my "major".
1. Exercise 10-15 minutes a day four times a week for one month.
2. Attend an aerobics class or exercise calss regularly for two months.
3. Go for an annual check-up at the doctor.
4. Give yourself a monthly exam for four months.
5. Set a goal to lose weight and do it.
6. Read the Word of Wisdom and make one improvement in your diet that corresponds to its counsel.
7. Take all family members to the dentist for exams.
8. Floss every day!

In the College of Theology I've chosen to:
1. Read 5 articles from recent Ensign magazines or other uplifting religious articles of your choice based on your faith.
2. Read my scriptures every day for one month.
3. Pray twoce a day on your knees for one month.
4. Kindly listen to every question asked of you by those in your household for one week.
5. Study the scriptures as a family every day for one month.

College of Applied Arts:
1. Learn to change a car's flat tire.
2. Re do a piece of furniture.
3. Clean my car inside and out.

College of Business and Economics:
1. Write out and follow a work schedule for one month.
2. Prepare your majoe Sunday meals ahead for 4 consecutive weeks.
3. Pick up and put away anything out of place before retiring and have each family member do the same for one month.

College of Fine Arts:
1. Attend a live symphony, music recital or dance performance.
2. Buy one classical or light classical CD for our home and play it.
3. Read about a famous painter, sculptor or composer.

College of Home Economics:
1. Can a vegetable.
2. Collect a one year supply of basic food items for our house.
3. Have a special candlelight dinner using our nicest dishes.

College of Interior Design:
1. Make new curtains for the family room and basement.
2. Make a floral arrangement for our bedroom.
3. Make a set of placemats or napkins.
4. Frame a family treasure.

College of Language Arts:
1. Write in your jornal at least once a week for three months.
2. Write a narrative, lyric or humourous song or poem.
3. Visit the library once a month for six months.

College of Social Science:
1. Do one act of compassionate service a month for four months.
2. Read an article a week for four weeks from a current news magazine.
3. Buy a world globe for our home.

College of Phychology:
1. Strive to be patient, kind, and understanding to everyone in your house for one week.
2. Plan and take one weekend or one day out of town with just your husband or close friend.
3. Change something about your appearance that you have wanted to for a while. Stay tuned for that one. I know exactly what I'm going to change.

This is going to be fun!

What A Difference A Day Makes

Today has been a good day. A dear friend of mine posted something about me and it touched me in ways that I can't even express. You can link from here. I am a white raspberry! Thank you Sam. I love you.

So Much To Say

I couldn't sleep last night thinking about what I wanted to write about. Do I remember any of it? Of course not! I'm not sure even where to begin. I'll just start with what happened today. I went to a music conference. There were several classes that I went to about becoming a recording artist. During one of the classes we were told to list 5 priorities that we had in life right now. Not one of them included a music career. I love singing. I love having the opportunity to sing with a well known LDS recording artist, Jenny Phillips. I recently auditioned to be a soloist for Jenny and she said that my voice was AMAZING. Yes, she used all caps! It made me feel great. All day long I felt out of place though. I realized that I am so perfectly content being in her choir and sharing an amazing message through song. I don't want to put in the time that it would take to become a recording artist. And that's ok. I still would LOVE to record on Jenny's upcoming CDs and am excited to record a song next Friday for a competition. I'll let you know how it goes. For so long now I've wondered where my life is supposed to go. I received a strong answer to that today. For a long time now I have just had this overwhelming feeling that if I'm doing the things that the Lord wants me to be doing He will lead me down the right paths. I am so happy where I am musically right now. I couldn't ask for more. And if recording with Jenny leads to futher opportunities I will jump at them. I just know that it's something that I'm not supposed to pursue at this point in my life.

I have GOT to get my poop in a pile. My life seems so scattered and unorganized. I feel like my depression in in check so I wonder why I can't seem to keep it together. My house is a wreck and I just don't have the motivation to clean it. The heat doesn't help either. I discovered something today. I am afraid. I am afraid of failing as a wife, a mother, a home maker and at losing this weight that I so desperately want to get rid of forever. I don't want to fail AGAIN.

I had lost 50 pounds. My son got sick and had 3 major operations this last year. And guess what? I packed every single pound back on! I'm so ashamed. I recently had the amazing opportunity to go on tour with Jenny Phillips and some of the most amazing people on earth. I hate how I look in the pictures. How do I stay motivated this time to make it happen again. Should I post pictures every where reminding myself of how fat I've gotten AGAIN? What do I do? I'm so scared to start Weight Watchers again. Do you know how many times I've started over again in the last few months? Let's put it this way...a dear friend and I started the same time way back when. I've gained and she's lost over 35 pounds.

I know this is something I have to do for myself. No one else can do this for me. I truly think this is going to be one of the hardest things I will ever do in my life. I'm going to do it this time. I'm going to use my blog to keep me motivated. I hope you will come along for the ride. I know it will get bumpy but knowing I have people following me will mean so much.

I'm sick of being a dissappointment. For my whole life I've felt like that. I've never been good enough. I'm still not to some people and I just have to deal with those feelings. Why am I not good enough for them? Why is it that everyone else around me tells me I am an amazing person but they can't see it? I know! It's perspective. They just see the bad. And they let the bad fester and it eats them alive. I don't know how anyone can truly be happy living like that. I am a good person. I make mistakes. I forget things. I am human. I just want to be loved and accepted for who I am. I want to have people tell me their sorry. I want to forgive. I NEED to forgive. I NEED to forgive myself. But I'm not sure how to do it. When you've grown up feeling like a failure...well it's a HARD thing to overcome.

Wow! This is not where I thought I'd go with this post. But I'm hurting tonight. I am in mourning for the losses and the gains, the heartaches I've had recently, the realization that I will never be enough for some people. I need to let them go. I need to surround myself with postitive, uplifting people. But what do you do when what you really want will probably never happen?

Obviously I am sad and lonely tonight. I just want to be loved for who I am. I want to know what that feels like. I tell my kids I love them several times a day. My daughter asks me "Mom, why do you always tell me you love me?" Because kiddo, I never want there to be any kind of doubt in your mind EVER.

It's so important to tell those that you've hurt that you are sorry. And I'm sorry if I've hurt anyone. There is a saying that says something like this...you don't need to say that you are sorry. Your enemies don't care and your friends already know. I hate that saying. It's not true. And so I'm sorry. I'm sorry Tami for gaining the weight back. I'm sorry Tami for telling you horrible things about your body and your self worth. I won't do it again. You are amazing. You can do this! You do have friends and some family that adore you for who you are despite your flaws. It's ok that you forget things some times. It's ok that things are late and life goes on. It's ok. You have people who love you and can forgive you!

YOU CAN DO THIS!!

I Love My Arms!!

I am a self loather. I say the most horrible things to myself. It's something I've been working on for a LOOOONNNGGG time now. I picked up a copy of Weight Watchers magazine the other day at the store. There is an article in it that has totally changed my perspective about my body and the way I "talk" to myself. It's called "Beat the Body Blues." You too can learn to flex your "self-esteem" muscle.
One of the suggestions was once a week stand in front of a mirror and focus on a different praiseworthy body part. Are you thinking they same thing I am? NO WAY... are no praiseworthy body parts on this body YET. But I tried it and loved it. I look at my arms in a completely different way. I used to hate the way they flapped in the breeze and bulged out from certain sleeves. I love them now because they help me. They have helped me carry my children. They held them as babies. They cook delicious meals. They have created many crafty craft projects. They hug my friends. They clap at my kids' dance recitals. They can type! They hugged my husband which made him fall in love with me. I love my legs too. They have carried me through some tough times. When I thought I couldn't take one more step they did!
I have an amazing body and so do you! It might not be at the weight I want and need it to be but it gives me amazing experiences every single day.
Changing my thinking has changed me for the better!

What I've Realized

I realized something last night about myself. I am terrible at doing things that TRULY make me happy and re-fill my "bucket". It's time that I really sit down and think about those things and prioritize my life. Do you know what I miss that truly, truly made me happy? Coupon shopping. Have you ever done that? I used to get 4 copies of the Sunday paper and that was my Sunday ritual in the morning. I would gather all of the ads and organize. I'm getting happy just remembering about it. I would have my excel spreadsheet with all the store's "deals" and go shopping. I got a thrill off of seeing how much I'd saved each time I shopped. I used to save $200-$300 on a single grocery shopping trip. My receipt would be taller than I am. I miss those days. I know what I'm doing this weekend! I'm getting my subscription back.
I need to take time to prioritize the activities in my life. I feel so scattered and I HATE that feeling. I feel like I have no control. I also LOVE to organize everything but you wouldn't know it because right now my house is no where near organized. My craft room has become a dumping ground. So that means no crafts and an unhappy me. It's time to get my life back in "order".
Maybe I'll post before and after pictures of my organizational projects.
I'm sick of being depressed again. It's a terrible place to be. My weight loss is ZILCH. I need to get my life back. I am addicted to this stupid computer. I'm on it all the time. It's terrible. So I'm taking a HUGE step for me and turning it off during the day. I can feel my heart start beating faster as I type this. I can do it. Hello...maybe if I turn off the computer and put my "addictions" aside I can get the stuff done that is really a priority.

In A Major Funk

Are there any Glee fans out there? Tuesday's episode was about being in a funk and what you can do to get out of it. I am in a funk...big time. I've been a little down this last week. I wasn't sure why until last night. Last night was the final dance performance my kids were in. The end of the performance was really special. I saw what true, unconditional love from a loved one looks like. It's too personal to really share on my blog. But it made me want to be a better person and more importantly a better mother. I never want there to be ANY doubt in their little minds that I love them unconditionally. I asked my daughter if she's ever felt that I don't love her and she gave me this look like..."Mom, are you serious? That is such a lame question." Whew...I was so relieved. I'm so glad that I have the type of relationship I do with my kids. Anyway I came home last night and checked my email and facebook accounts. Again...I won't go into details but I started sobbing because of something someone wrote. I knew it was intended for me and that hurt even more.
I started crying, no sobbing. It was almost as if years of hurt and pain came out in my tears.
So what did I do? I immediately walked into the kitchen and started eating pizza of all things. And then I got even more upset. I was standing by the kitchen sing crying when my husband walked in. I fell into his arms and he just let me cry there. Boy this is getting personal and you are probably wondering why I am sharing this. I just want to know how you have overcome the need to eat when life gets sad or stressing. I honestly feel so very alone right now. Actually that's not true. I feel sad for relationships lost and relationships that I thought were great but really aren't so. I LOVE and thank those that love me and support me despite my faults and mistakes. Now how do I over come the food addiction?? HELP!!

Take A Tour With Me

Welcome to our blog tour! I hope you enjoy the tour of some pretty cool blogs. Make sure you check them all out. Just click on the link below and then click on their link, etc. You'll eventually end up back at my blog!

I am just beginning my weight loss journey. Ok...that' not entirely true. A couple of years ago I lost almost 50 pounds. I gained almost all of it back. So now I'm at it again. This is me now. It was taken while I was singing at a good friend's wedding. She posted it on facebook and I just about died. How did I squeeze my big, fat boobs into that? I won't be wearing this shirt again for a while! So here it is...my "before" picture.

I've only lost about 4 pounds. But hey...it's 4 pounds! I'm following the Weight Watchers Momentum program. I have a gym membership that I try to go to regularly. I absolutely LOVE Zumba. It's offered a few times a week at the gym and it's so much fun. You'll never know you are getting a GREAT workout in.

This rice pudding is my all time favorite snack right now. It's only 1 point! I've eaten Kozy Shack Rice Pudding for years now and I never knew they had a healthy version of it. I was so happy when I found this. It's worth every penny I spend on it!

The biggest life lesson I've learned is forgiveness. I tend to beat myself up over everything. I say terrible things to myself and I'm trying so hard to stop that and to forgive myself. I have had to let go of the fact that I gained so much weight back and that's been good for me. I believe in myself and I WILL do it again.

The biggest strength I've discovered it that I can stop eating when I'm full and that I don't have to fear the feeling of being hungry. I totally used food as comfort. I would stuff myself silly and that would be comfortable for me. Even changing my eating over the last little while has shown me that I feel so much better when I don't over eat and when I eat the right things. It's empowering to stop and put my fork down or cover my plate with my napkin.

My toughest struggle has been exercise. I'm just not in the habit of doing it. I have a gym membership now and NEED to get my bootie there so my membership doesn't go to waste. I've got to figure out what system works for me. I think it will be a lot easier when my kids are out of school and I can go really early in the morning.

My biggest supporter has been my friend Sam. She probably doesn't know that but it's true. I joined WW when she did but I quit twice since she's been doing it. It's been hard this time. And she has encouraged me and loved me. She keeps me going. My husband is also a support. I got him to join too! Tonight is his first meeting.

When I make it to goal I plan to go crazy shopping! Before I was heavy my closet was FULL of GAP clothes. I can't wait to shop there again. I just can't wait to go into a store and know that I can shop in any section I want to! I can't wait to buy a cute swim suit. I might need a tummy tuck first! :)

I'm not sure what I would've wanted someone to say to me when I started WW again. I would tell someone to let go of fear. I know I was afraid. I was afraid of failure and of it not working. It does work! It's hard but good work. I can do it, you can do it! I'm your cheerleader! Now let's put our forks down and get to work!

The next blog on the tour is Anne's blog at Smaller Fun Pants. I hope you enjoy the tour!

Blog Tour Tomorrow!

I am excited for our blog tour tomorrow. Stop by tomorrow and take the tour with me. You'll be directed to some amazing blogs! See you tomorrow! Good Night.

Learning...I Won't Beat Myself Up

We went out to dinner at Cafe Rio last night. I did not order my usual pork salad. I ordered two pork tacos instead with black beans and rice. I was really surprised how satisfying it was. But after I ate I felt guilty. I was totally satisfied after eating some rice, beans and ONE of the tacos. Did I stop? Nope. I ate that 2nd taco and then the terrible voices in my head started raging! They told me I was a loser, had no self control, I was a pig, etc. But then I stopped!! I started re-thinking things. I had made a BETTER choice by ordering tacos instead of that salad. And even though I ate two tacos I told myself that I am making progress in my weight loss journey. I know that I have to change my habits. And so I turned self loathing into something positive. So next time I know that I can order one taco, rice and beans and feel totally 100% satisfied. Plus I'll save a lot of money too!!

Beautiful Blogger Award

I am honored to receive this blogging award! Thank you to my friend Sam over at Believe In Yourself. She has been my inspiration, she believes in me and keeps me motivated. I love her!
The rules of this award: pass it onto 7 other bloggers. And then tell 7 things about yourself that no one really knows. BTW...I have to change the rules just this once! I'm awarding 5 bloggers.

I am happy to award this beautiful blogging award to the following well deserved bloggers!! Not all of these are weight loss blogs. They are blogs that enrich my life and will do the same to yours. And I don't know about you but when I read about others I am more inspired to be a better person!

1. Jocelyn at We Talk of Christ, We Rejoice in Christ. She is one amazing woman! Her blog is family centered and service centered. She really inspires me to be a better person! I hope I can meet her one day! Jocelyn, thanks for being my new friend! You always have something positive to say.

2. Misty at Misty's Scrapbook Corner. Misty and I went to school together way back when! She is an amazing woman. She is kind and compassionate. She is amazingly talented! I only dream of having true talent like this. She's got it going on! Misty thank you for your amazing courage and determination.

3. Petit Elefant is my next award. I don't know her personally but I've been a follow of hers for some time now. She's awesome! I love her blog. She has so many followers and I'm probably just another "number" to her but she's not to me!

4. Shan at Design Gal & Her Handyman. I found out about her blog because of a local news program. She has amazing thrift store ideas. Her vision of items found are out of this world! I can't wait to make her jewelry holder.

5. Audrey at Audrey's Bliss is a favorite. Her blog is private but deserves recognition. Her attitude is infectious. She radiates positiveness. She and I perform in the Jenny Phillips Choir together and I swear my life is better because of her attitude about life and family. You rock Audrey!

Here are 7 crazy, fun facts about me...

1. I LOVE to fold socks. If all laundry was just socks I would want to do it every day. It's so fun! So if you hate to fold socks I'll come over and do it for you!

2. I LOVE jewelry...the bigger, the better! I love rings. I have almost 30 different rings. And they are big, loud and sometimes gaudy. I can't go into a store without stopping by the jewelry section. I love earrings, bracelets, necklaces and cute watch bands. Awww...just blogging about jewelry makes me happy!

3. I collect magnets from the places we've traveled to. I'm not sure how many I have but our refrigerator is getting pretty full!

4. I am totally afraid of big dogs. It doesn't matter what kind of dog it is. If it's big...I'm afraid.

5. I LOVE to play games. I LOVE to act silly and immature when I play them too. Floppy face anyone? Or how about I've Never... We host FUN parties. They are legendary! Ok, maybe not but our friends do look forward to them.

6. I HATE unpacking from trips. I will dump out the dirty clothes and then live out of the suitcase until it's empty, then I can put it away. I went to Minneapolis in April and I think there's still a couple of things left in the suitcase.

7. One of my favorite things to eat it left over turkey dipped in ketchup. Hey! Don't knock it until you try it. Ok...I know it sounds gross but my dad would eat that growing up and I loved it. It's not Thanksgiving time until I have turkey and ketchup. Oh yea...the turkey has to be cold.

Thanks again Sam for the award!! I guess I need to find some fun weight loss blogs to follow also!

You've Got To Try These LOW Point Foods!

I'm now on the lookout for delicious, low-point foods. Here are my latest finds. I love rice pudding. I love Kozy Shack's rice pudding but it's really high in fat, sugar and calories. I found no sugar added rice pudding last night at the store. I pulled out my handy dandy WW calculator and discovered they are only 1 point each! I tried it this morning and it is so good. And did I mention it's only 1 point! I am so excited that I can still eat rice pudding.I NEED a chocolate fix every day. My life won't go on if I can't have chocolate. These mousse cups fro Jell-O are only 1 point each. I love the light texture and the rich chocolate taste. I don't need a candy bar with these around.

I am so in love with this cereal. The vanilla taste is subtle and not so sweet, which I love. It's all natural and will even leave little black vanilla specks in your milk. My daughter wanted to know why they had put pepper in her cereal. It's definitely NOT pepper!

Guess how many points this little packet of apples has? ZERO. That's right! If you only eat one pack that is! These are expensive but worth every penny. I found a box of mixed varieties at Costco (I think it was around $14.00 for 20 bags). The pears and bananas/strawberries are 1 point each. They are crunchy, light and a perfect snack to keep at your desk or purse.

I've saved the best for last! These alternative bagels are only 1 point each. I'm not kidding. They are great toasted. I had a bagel sandwich for breakfast this morning. I cooked 3 egg whites in olive oil (got that in today!) and sandwiched that between an onion bagel. I was a little hesitant to try these because who wants to eat an "alternative" to anything? They are amazing!

What are your yummy, low-point finds?

I'm Hungry!

I'm hungry right now. It's a feeling I've been so scared to feel. I think that's one reason why I kept myself full all the time. Why was I afraid of hunger? Would it hurt? Would it scar me for life? Would my face turn purple? Of course not. But feeling full was my comfort. I ate what I wanted, when I wanted and I ate a TON. I didn't do that today. I promised myself I'd stick to my points and that I'd eat smart. So what that I'm hungry...hello it's 5 o'clock and time for dinner. It's a good feeling actually. I'm going to have a snack so I don't pig out when we go out to eat tonight. I survived being hungry!! What are you afraid of?

I'm Fat AGAIN!

So here it is...my story. Ok, not so much of a story as a journey that I'm on and you can come along for the ride! I'm fat. Yep, it's true. I clearly remember being in high school and wishing a certain cheerleader would get fat when she got "old". She's not, she's absolutely beautiful and I'm the fat one. I was never overweight as a kid or teenager. When my husband and I were married I had gained some weight but was pretty comfortable wearing a size 14. We were married 12 years ago and now I can't wait for the day I can wear a size 14 comfortably! A couple of years ago I lost almost 50 pounds. I was looking good (I was almost that size 14 again)! But then my son got sick and spent a lot of time in the hospital. He's had 3 MAJOR surgeries in the last year. I stopped taking care of myself and I stopped going to my Weight Watchers meetings. The weight slowly crept back on. Now here I am almost at my starting weight AGAIN. Uggg. I joined WW a while ago and have been very wishy washy. I have been going for 5 weeks straight now and have gained weight each week. Why? Because I haven't been following one thing that they talk about. I didn't care yet.

I care now. I had my light bulb moment this week. And I'm pumped up now! I can't wait to get started. This is a new week. I CAN do this. YOU can do this. Let's do this TOGETHER!! I realized that I need support. I need it like a fat kid needs chocolate. Ok...probably not the right thing to say but you get the point. The meetings are great each week but how can I stay motivated? Through this bloggity blog I tell ya! So buckle your seat belts! It's going to be a bumpy but a GREAT ride!!

A Slight Change...

I'm adding to this blog. I'm going to include my battle with weight along with my battle with depression. They go hand in hand for me. I have SO much to blog about and can't wait to get started. I don't have much time tonight but it's worth waiting for!! Stay tuned!!

So Much To Say

I have so much on my mind right now. I had an appt. with Dr. Mike last week. He walked in and asked how I was doingl My immediate reaction was "I'm doing really good". We chatted for a minute and then he asked why I wasn't taking my ADD meds. I gave some lame excuses and then promised him that I would stay on them because I need them. It really is a pain to go in every month to get my Rx but I did promise him. He then asked me if I was having suicidal thoughts. I had promised myself a long time ago that I'd be honest with him because I really did want to get better. I thought about it for a minute and then told him yes. I think about it everyday. I didn't think it was a big deal because they are just fleeting thoughts. They aren't ones that I was thinking were a big deal because I wouldn't really do it. He told me that those were NOT normal. I had grown so used to having them everyday that they did become normal to me. That was the first time that someone had told me that it's NOT. Honestly it was shocking to hear. I thought that I was doing so much better. And I am I just now know that it's not ok to think about dying everyday. So if you are and you think it's ok because you know you'd never really follow through with them (like me) go get help!!

He upped my meds. I am still getting used to the medication. I am really tired. But I am so happy to be back on my ADD meds. I don't get irritated as much when I get interrupted. It was very frustrating for me when I was concentrating so hard on something and then one of my kids needed something because it would take me forever to try and re-focus.

I used to be so ashamed of my depression. I hid behind a "happy mask". I thought I was alone. It's hard for people to be understanding when they don't understand what is going on. I lost friends and frustrated people along the way. This blog has helped me so much and I hope that it's helped others.

Dr. Mike also said something that made me feel better about my depression. He said that our goal was to get into "remission". I had never thought of it like that. I like how he phrased it.

Depression is hard to live with. It truly is a battle that I have to fight on a daily basis. It's not something that I can "snap out of". No one can just snap out of it. And those, like me, who suffer from chronic depression will NEVER be "cured". But we can have it go into "remission". So if you are beating yourself up because you aren't cured STOP!! Accept it as a life long battle that CAN be won!!

You can do it! And you CAN be happy! I know first hand!

I Got Called On A Mission!!

Ok...not really. But I did get the amazing book for Christmas and had to give a shout out to Michael McLean for writing what I don't have the talent to write. The advice and music are great. I had been searching for something that would be meaningful and helpful in this fight and I found it. My kids and I turn up the music and sing and dance. They understand the message too. The music is upbeat and energetic to say the least. It's fun. I've accepted my "call" and am now on the Mission 2 Be Happy.
Here are the songs that are on the CD:
1.Mission 2 Be Happy
2.Sick 'n Tired (of being sick 'n tired)
3.Pills
4. You Don't Know How Long This is Gonna Last
5.With Paul and John
6.I Don't Need a Sign
7. Someone Else
8. I've Got To Find Out Who I Am
9. One
10. The Toodle-OO
11. See Us Shine
12.What D'ya Got
13. Use Words
14. Something Perfect

So do you want a call too? You can! You can order it here.

I have learned that happiness is a choice. And on my really bad days I literally have to tell myself out loud...be happy, don't yell, it's ok, get up!, get showered, etc. It has made a huge difference in my life. So make the choice to be happy!